Tag: Biography

Do Not Lose Heart

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Do Not Lose Heart

13.1 My Story

My wife was excited when the eleven months of taking the prescription chemotherapy medications ended.

I was expecting her to do a happy dance and to go celebrating her accomplishment. Instead of a time of rejoicing, it became a solemn watershed. She was tired of the handful of pills she took multiple times a day and the way they controlled her life and schedule.

“Jimmie, I will never do chemo again. I know you’ll support my decision,” she said with the authority and resolve of a drill sergeant barking orders.

I looked at her. I’m sure she saw the questioning, the disappointment, the lack of understanding in my face. I knew better than to question her decision. Her mind was made up. Challenging her decision would bring her to tears. Confronting her choice would breach my commitment to her.

I prayed for God to give me wisdom before I replied. I heard myself say, “You have decided never to do chemo again. You request me to support your decision. Is that correct?”

“Don’t be so clinical. Please, do not treat me like you did the children when they were young,” she said deliberately with an attitude almost spitting each word at me.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized. “I was just restating what you said to make sure I heard you correctly.”

“You heard me. Our body isn’t made to take these treatments. You can’t imagine how horrible they are.”

I just looked at her and listened as she continued talking.

“I’m not saying I want to die today. I don’t want to die. However, I know that I have an eternity with Jesus Christ in Heaven, waiting at the end of this horrible journey. No pain, no suffering, a new body, a grand family reunion with my family and your mother (my mother was deceased, my dad would live another three months). It’s only because of the final destination that I can continue with this journey with the Melanoma Cancer. Living with cancer is hard. It’s terrible.”

13.2 Not Losing Heart

Part of caring for a person with a chronic illness is not losing heart. Your maintaining a positive attitude helps you to provide the best care. Keeping an optimistic view helps maintain our outlook from an eternal perspective.

In 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 verse, God is pointing out we should view all earthly adversity in comparison with our future heavenly glory. When we do this, we should be strengthened to endure our human trials.

13.3 Bible Verse

2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (KJV), “For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.”

13.4 What the Verse Means

While our bodies (outward man) grow old and suffer from diseases, our spiritual side (inward man) is renewed daily. Too often, we only focus on the things we see in this present life. We need to also focus on the spiritual, that is the things that are not seen but given to us by God as a future promise. 

We see this with our “spiritual eyes.” It takes belief. A part of faith is believing that what God has promised he will undoubtedly bring to pass. I have confidence in God’s word and promises.

13.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father help me to focus on You, my loved one’s final destination and never to lose heart.
  • Lord Jesus, help me remember that while my loved one’s outer body is perishing, yet their inward body is being renewed daily.
  • God, I realize the chronic illness my loved one is facing won’t last forever but is working in them and me a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.
  • Lord God help me to not look at my loved one’s circumstances which are temporary but to look on the things that are not now seen, but eternal.

13.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Lord Jesus, help me have the courage to see my loved one’s situation from their point of view. 
  2. God in Heaven, help me to support their choices. 
  3. Father, help me to listen to my loved one. 

13.7 Takeaway

It is helpful to maintain our perspective toward our loved one and caregiving from an eternal perspective.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Image by dalnimi oh from Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

How to Have Real Prosperity

Posted in Blog, Caregiver, Caregiving, Jim Kepler, Jimmie A. Kepler, Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Jimmie Kepler3 Comments

How to Have Real Prosperity

12.1 My Story

My wife and I saw the same dermatologist. She is the physician that initially diagnosed Miss Benita’s Melanoma cancer.

Following my wife’s initial Melanoma cancer surgery, I scheduled an appointment to get myself checked. I needed to stay in good health.

At the follow-up appointment, I shared I had a biopsy of a spot in my mouth. The result of the biopsy was oral lichen planus. I was referred to my dermatologist by the oral surgeon for follow-up treatment.

Oral lichen planus is a chronic inflammatory disease that affects the mucous membrane of the oral cavity. 

The dermatologist told me she knew I was under excessive stress with Miss Benita’s cancer treatment. She asked if additional events were happening in life that was causing me stress.

I shared the added stress I was under from caring for my 89 years old father. I said it also didn’t help that my long-term day job had just completed a significant reduction in force and reorganization. I was still employed and experiencing the changes of doing more with less.

She said what I knew. “Stress is everywhere in your life.”

Just days before Miss Benita went into hospice care, I was diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Disease. The gastro endocrinologist said while there is no known cause, he was assuming since I had the oral lichen planus and that I was under excessive stress with Miss Benita’s cancer treatment that the pressures of life were a major contributing factor.

My point is the stress of caregiving may impact you physically. I do not give medical advice. This book is not intended as medical advice. If you are having health issues, see your physician for medical advice.

However, for you to provide the best care for your loved one, you need to also care for yourself. I saw my physician. She helped me to be able to keep on keeping on and continue to be a caregiver for my spouse.

12.2 Real Prosperity is in the Lord Jesus Christ

Part of caring for a person with a chronic or terminal illness realizes our real prosperity is in the Lord Jesus Christ. Today’s passage speaks of our mental health and general well-being.

12.3 Bible Verse

3 John 1:2 (KJV), “Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.”

12.4 What the Verse Means

John, the author, is addressing Gaius. John wants Gaius to prosper and have good health equal to his spiritual health.

For your information, in the Book of 3 John, Gaius is John’s friend. Gaius was known for his hospitality to traveling preachers, for being faithful, loving, and walking in the truth.

12.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father I pray that I may prosper, that is to be healthy physically and fiscally. Why? Not to be rich but to care for my family and pay my medical bills.
  • Lord Jesus, I pray that I would be in physically good health and that my health would mirror my spiritual health.
  • I pray for rest and peace of mind.

12.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Do you have any medical concerns about yourself? List your concerns. Also, seek medical attention to your concerns as soon as possible.
  2. Are you getting adequate sleep? If not, talk to your health care professional for advice. 
  3. Are you eating properly? Seek the help of your health care professional if you have questions. 

12.7 Takeaway

Real prosperity is knowing Christ as Savior.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

How to Trust God

Posted in Blog, Caregiver, Caregiving, Jim Kepler, Jimmie A. Kepler, Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Jimmie KeplerLeave a comment
The picture is of Benita Kepler with the Atlantic Ocean behind her. The photo’s date is Thursday, August 11, 2016. The location is Rye North Beach, New Hampshire. She is wearing her signature smile as well as compression lymphedema sleeve and gauntlet (glove). I always told her the gauntlet (glove) made her look like a rock star referencing Madonna’s fingerless glove look from the 1980s.

How to Trust God

11.1 My Story

In August of 2016, my wife Benita and I took a lengthy “bucket list” trip. In our forty plus years of marriage, she had never been to the northeastern USA. She had heard stories from my early teens when I lived in New England as a military brat. She also had never been to New York or the middle Atlantic states.

The trip wasn’t easy. Even with my wife’s terminal Melanoma cancer, her employer initially said no to her being off work for multiple weeks of vacation even though she had sufficient accrued vacation days. My day job also lacked compassion. We both found the situation frustrating as we had more days of leave accumulated than needed for the trip. Finally, both employers agreed to let us off work.

The trip required a small refrigerator for the car as her chemotherapy prescription medications needed refrigeration. The large lymphedema therapy machine had to be unloaded and loaded each day along with scheduling time for her to do an hour’s therapy per day.

Many days it would be as later as 10 AM before we were able to get checked out of our hotel. Most days we were checked into the hotel by 5 PM. When you drive those few hours in a day, it takes a long time to travel the over 2,200 miles from Dallas, Texas to Northern Maine.

Out lengthy trip included stops at cool places like Niagara Falls, and Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream Factory just outside of Burlington, Vermont. We visited university campuses like Dartmouth, Harvard, MIT, Bowdoin College, Brown, Yale, Virginia Military Institute, Washington and Lee Universities, and their libraries. She saw where I attended junior high school in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. The State of Liberty and New York City, and Philadelphia were included on the agenda. We also went to Gettysburg, the Hershey Chocolate Factory, and all the Washington, DC sites.

We skipped the National Football League Hall of Fame, Major League Baseball Hall of Fame, Basketball Hall of Fame, as well as the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. She said I could go back to those places after she was gone as she had no interest.

The journey ended back home attending a concert by her favorite singer, Kenny Rogers.

The trip was hard for her. She was so glad we made it. She told me she appreciated my patience. She knew I was up hours before her. I sat still patiently while she slept and rested. I also sat reading when she did the lymphedema therapy. She always had control of the television remote device in the hotel. The TV was never turned on when she was resting or asleep.

I got very tired of hauling the luggage, medicines, and medical equipment into and out of the hotels. I admit that. I couldn’t trust the bellhop at the hotels to treat the medical equipment with the tender loving care it needed. The only time I entrusted the machine to one, I found disconnected hoses and a power cable that had fallen off and were in the middle of the hallway.

The entire bucket list trip was an adventure in trusting God. What if we had trouble with her chemotherapy medications while 2,500 miles from home? We did, and God cut through the red tape to take care of it.

My attitude, trust in God, and love for my wife somehow allowed me to navigate the journey He had for my loved one and me. He’ll do the same for you.

11.2 Trusting God

Part of caring for a person with a chronic or terminal illness is trusting God. When dealing with a protracted disease, sometimes it is tough to maintain focus or have peace of mind.

The person battling the ailment often finds themselves dwelling on what is happening to them physically, fiscally, and wondering if they’ll even have a future. It can be hard.

As a caregiver, you may feel like all you do is manage schedules and provide taxi services. You find yourself longing for the good old days before the illness took over your life.

Isaiah 26:3 gives us hope as it tells us peace of mind is available. The way to peace is to focus on God, not your problem. It is to trust God. I’ll repeat it, trust God.

11.3 Bible Verse

Isaiah 26:3 (KJV), “Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.”

11.4 What the Verse Means

The key word is trust. We have a requirement to trust God. Trusting in God, that is when our mind is focused on Him, not our troubles, allows us to be kept in God’s perfect peace.

11.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father help me to keep my mind steadfast on You.
  • Thank You for the peace of mind that can only come from God.
  • Lord Jesus, help me to take my refuge in You.
  • God, I know You are the only hope my loved one has in battling her chronic illness.

11.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Name one area where you need to let go and trust God.
  2. Are you thanking God daily for guiding you through the daily challenges? If not, do so now and every day.
  3. Are you genuinely trusting God? Ask God to help your unbelief and lack of trust in and for all things. 

11.7 Takeaway

The key word is TRUST in God. Trusting in God allows us to be kept in perfect peace.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: The photo was taken by Jimmie Aaron Kepler. The picture is of Benita Kepler with the Atlantic Ocean behind her. The photo’s date is Thursday, August 11, 2016. The location is Rye North Beach, New Hampshire. She is wearing her signature smile as well as compression lymphedema sleeve and gauntlet (glove). I always told her the gauntlet (glove) made her look like a rock star referencing Madonna’s fingerless glove look from the 1980s.

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

How to Have Real Direction For Your Life

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How to Have Real Direction For Your Life

10.1 My Story

I was always amazed at the child-like faith my wife showed in the Lord Jesus Christ. Her faith reminded me of a bumper sticker frequently seen in the late 1960s and early 1970s. It just stated, “God said it, I believe it, and that settles it.”

As she confronted cancer, she regularly would quote Job 14:5-7 King James Version (KJV), “Seeing his days are determined, the number of his months are with thee, thou hast appointed his bounds that he cannot pass; Turn from him, that he may rest, till he shall accomplish, as a hireling, his day.”

She would comment that she was getting the recommended treatment the medical team suggested. She knew the team of physicians were part of the healing team and God’s plan.

Then she would add, “You know, God has my days numbered. He knew from the beginning of time when I was going to be born. He also knows when He is calling me home.

My wife saw no need to worry about doing this or trying that to attempt to squeeze an extra day of life. She knew her Heavenly Father already had it all worked out. She was okay with God’s plan.

I pray my faith in God could demonstrate an equal trust in God.

10.2 Thy Word

Part of caring for a person with a chronic illness understands the power of God’s Word. 

This chapter’s verse, Jeremiah 15:16, is a reminder of the power and guidance of God’s word, the Holy Bible. Psalm 119:105 (KJV) helps explain part of the purpose of God’s word. It reads, “Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.”

10.3 Bible Verse

Jeremiah 15:16 (KJV), “Thy words were found, and I did eat them; and thy word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart: for I am called by thy name, O Lord God of hosts.”

10.4 What the Verse Means

The verse reflects Jeremiah’s call to the office of prophet. He had not sought or expected to be a prophet. Likewise, God calls us to follow him as Believers of Jesus Christ.

As Jeremiah mentions eating the words of God, he is expressing the close relationship between him and God that comes from reading, hearing, and consuming the word of God.

Jeremiah concludes the passage is telling us that he is called by God’s name. It is a reminder that God set him apart and ordained him to be a prophet.

Likewise, as a Believer in Jesus Christ, God has selected you and you, like Jeremiah, are required to respond to God’s having selected you.

10.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father thank You for the Bible, Your word.
  • Lord God, help me listen to, meditate, and memorize Your Word, as well as allowing it to sustain me.
  • Your Word brings joy to my heart.
  • Lord Jesus, that You for selecting me.

10.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Are you trusting God for your tomorrows?
  2. Do you read and apply the Bible to your everyday living? 
  3. Have you considered offering to read the Bible to your loved one? You can ask, “Is okay for me to share a short Bible passage that spoke to me?” 

10.7 Takeaway

God’s Word is perfect. His Word provides direction for your life.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

The Source of Real Peace

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The Source of Real Peace

9.1 My Story

I thought I was Superman. I believed I could handle anything that would come my way in caring for my wife as she battled Melanoma cancer.

I was wrong.

Over Mother’s Day Weekend in May 2016, my wife started an eleven-month treatment with prescription chemotherapy medications. In less than twenty-four hours of taking her first dosage, her temperature was 104-degrees. She was disoriented, non-communicative, and near death. I was scared and felt helpless.

All three of my grown children were home for the Mother’s Day Weekend. My wife’s two sisters had flown in from out of state to visit. They had good reason to come.

My wife’s PET Scan in late April had shown Melanoma had spread. It was in her left shoulder, lungs, between her lungs, in her thyroid, neck, pelvic area, right thigh, and in almost every area of the body except the brain. The oncologist said my wife would have weeks to months to live without the new chemotherapy prescription medications.

Miss Benita reluctantly agreed to the chemotherapy meds. Within hours of taking them, she wished she hadn’t. She knew death would be better than dealing with the sickness she was now experiencing.

I remembered the managing oncologist’s instructions as she started the medications. He had said she might experience elevated temperature. Her temperature of 104-degrees plus wasn’t elevated; it was extreme. He also said nausea was common. Her nausea was endless vomiting. I was told to call the doctor first before taking her to an emergency room at the hospital or calling 911 if she experienced these side-effects.

I called the doctor. He gave detailed instructions. I felt like I was now a critical care registered nurse. I felt overwhelmed, incompetent, scared, and responsible for my wife. He had me make sure she stayed hydrated. We stopped the chemo meds for a few days. We adjusted the dosages and their administration.

During this time my wife’s oldest sister’s faith in God, calm demeanor and trust in my caring for her sister guided me through the valley of the shadow of death through which I knew my wife was walking. Somehow my bride’s body adjusted to the meds. They were miracle drugs. He adjusting to them was equally miraculous.

Within six weeks, the PET Scan showed no traces of the Melanoma. For the next seventeen months, all scans and tests showed no Melanoma Cancer. The cancer stayed in remission from then until December 7, 2017, when the diagnosis of a brain tumor changed everything. My wife never had Melanoma Cancer recur anywhere in her body except in the brain. Unfortunately, the prescription chemo meds could not cross into the brain. The blood-brain barrier which prevented the crossing is a natural barrier designed by God to protect the brain.

During the process with the chemotherapy prescription medications, I saw an amazing peace descend on both my wife and me. Yes, it was a God thing. But it also was a family thing. Having sister’s in law that prayed and believed was a blessing. My children’s belief in my ability to care for their mother also helped. I confess I wasn’t short of hubris in this area.

God’s giving me peace of mind and an ability to keep on keeping on was the key. God is faithful. I can testify that I cried out to God, and He was there to walk with me through caring for my wife.

9.2 Real Peace Comes from God

Part of caring for a person with a chronic illness understands that real peace comes from God. Living to care for a person with a chronic disease can leave us overwhelmed.

The endless stream of questions from well-meaning family, friends, acquaintances, and coworkers drains us. We find ourselves emotionally and physically exhausted. At times we need more than rest. We need peace.

As we learn to care for a person with a chronic illness, we realize that real peace comes from God.

9.3 Bible Verse

John 14:27 (KJV), “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

9.4 What the Verse Means

The verse uses the Jewish form of greeting and blessing. Indeed, the hearers understand this wish for peace. Jesus wishes them the same serenity of soul as he experiences. He leaves the availability of this peace with them. 

Jesus lets them know his words are not idle or meaningless. He means what he says. His words are true.

Because his words are factual, we should not fear the future. No matter how difficult the challenges are that you face, stand firm. Remember, Jesus paid the price for your comfort, salvation, and redemption.

9.5 Prayer Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father, thank You for the gift of peace.
  • Lord, I pray my heart would not be troubled.
  • I pray I would not fear as I continue the battle against the chronic illness.

9.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Have you asked God for peace of mind? Why not pray now?
  2. Have you turned your fears over to the Lord? He’s listening even now. I encourage you to start listing them. God will hear you. 
  3. Being afraid is normal. Thank God for giving you the ability to feel and care.

9.7 Takeaway

Real peace comes from God.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Image by makunin from Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

How to Use Your Remaining Time

Posted in Blog, Caregiver, Caregiving, Jim Kepler, Jimmie A. Kepler, Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Jimmie KeplerLeave a comment

How to Use Your Remaining Time

8.1 My Story

“How long …”

I asked the question doctors dread to hear. How long will my wife live? 

I had spoken those words to the physician when my mother had her kidney transplant. I also said those two words when I took my ninety-years old father to the emergency room and found out he had suffered a major heart attack that would take his life in hours. I repeated the words when my wife had Melanoma cancer surgery and had thirty-four lymph nodes removed because the disease had spread into them.

With my spouse, I remember the oncologist giving the five-year survival rate’s very depressing odds. She emphasized enjoying the now. She strongly stressed if cancer recurred it would be terminal. She said, “Live for today. Enjoy every day.”

Less than six months later, the Melanoma cancer returned. My wife lived another two years and two months after the recurrence. She survived nearly two years longer than what we were told to expect.

I worked hard to make each day she lived a positive experience. I also took her on a multi-week “bucket list” trip where we had quality time together.

The trip was challenging as I had to get a refrigerator for our car for her prescription chemotherapy medications. Daily, I also had to pack and unpack a cumbersome lymphedema therapy machine. My wife had to sit for an hour every day hooked to the device to control swelling in her left arm, wrist, and hand.

My point is we made good use of the time available. I made sure my wife saw her sisters multiple times. I made sure our grown children were engaged in her life.

God was gracious and gave her 1001 days from the first surgery. He also gave me the patience and desire to serve her.

The hope we both had through Jesus Christ allowed us to face each day with hope.

8.2 Use the Time God Has Given You

Part of caring for a person with a chronic illness is learning to use the time God has given you. The Bible teaches that God has the days of our lives numbered. Here are five examples:

  1. Job 14:5 King James Version (KJV), “Seeing his days are determined, the number of his months are with thee, thou hast appointed his bounds that he cannot pass;”
  2. Job 21:21 (KJV), “For what does he care for his household after him, When the number of his months is cut off?”
  3. Psalm 31:15 (KJV), “My times are in Your hand; Deliver me from the hand of my enemies and from those who persecute me.”
  4. Psalm 139:16 (KJV), “Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.”
  5. Ecclesiastes 3:2 (KJV), “A time to give birth and a time to die; A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.”

8.3 Bible Verse

Psalm 39:4 (KJV), “Lord, make me to know mine end, and the measure of my days, what it is: that I may know how frail I am.”

8.4 What the Verse Means

The verse shares thoughts concerning the psalmist meditations on human life. He reflects on life’s brevity, life’s vanity, and life’s sorrows.

He wonders why life was so short. Why was it so vain? Why was it so full of pain?

8.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Father in heaven, thank You for reminding me of how brief my time on earth will be. Help me to use the days I have with my loved one to the fullest.
  • Lord Jesus, thank You for reminding me that You are in control of the length of a person’s life. Help me to trust that You know what is best for me.
  • God, help me remember how short my life is and to live my days to Your honor and Your glory.

8.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Are you helping your loved live the remaining days of their life to the fullest? What can you do today to make a good day for your loved one?
  2. What can you do to encourage friends and family to engage with your chronically or terminally ill loved one?
  3. Make sure you include rest in the management of your one’s time. What can you do today to make sure you take time to rest?

8.7 Takeaway

The Bible teaches God has our days numbered. We need to live each day to the fullest.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Image by JamesDeMers from Pixabay.

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

The Therapeutic Value of Romantic Comedies

Posted in Blog, Caregiver, Caregiving, Jim Kepler, Jimmie A. Kepler, Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Jimmie Kepler5 Comments

The Therapeutic Value of Romantic Comedies

7.1 My Story

There is nothing funny about a spouse having a chronic or terminal illness. There indeed isn’t anything comical about caring for them and all the nuisances involved with the daily routine.

Over the years, I had heard time and time again that opposites attract. My experience would agree with the statement. Many times I have been told I am the least spontaneous person alive.

Maybe my living my life structured like a German railroad schedule or the fact I grew up in a career military family and then was a US Army officer helped influence me in this arena. My wife enjoyed the structure of routine but also loved the unexpected blessings of life. Where I needed a to-do list and schedule for my day and had my day disrupted with change, she embraced the unexpected.

I also am a very stoic person. Again, being a military officer affected me in this area. I believe nearly twenty-years of full-time Christian ministry also had me being the rock of stability in stressful situations. I was the steady influence, the calm in the storm for so many. It allowed me to officiate funerals of friends and even my parents with a solemn seriousness that my wife sometimes hated and caused others to refer to me as a robot-man.

I remember the surgical oncologist actively encouraging me to lighten up. She said my serious all the time attitude was contagious. My constant seriousness was gloomy and the incorrect disposition for my wife to catch.

The doctor added attitude is crucial when dealing with a chronic illness like my wife’s cancer. The cheerfulness of mind does good like a medicine for the body. Our outlook contributes to the restoration or preservation of bodily health and vigor.

Medical science tells us the red blood cells, most white blood cells, and platelets are produced in the bone marrow, the soft fatty tissue inside bone cavities. Proverbs 17:22 (KJV) teaches, “A poor spirit/attitude ‘drieth the bones’ which produce the needed cells.”

The surgical oncologist encouraged me to watch romantic comedies, funny situation comedies, and even some comedy specials with my wife. She said they would get us both laughing. It would help me to lighten my mood. It would help with my wife’s healing. She said there is therapeutic value in watching romantic comedies.

The medical doctor questioned my expectation of the value of the prescribed treatments asking if I was already given over to my wife’s death to cancer. She said it was too early to give up hope. She said those with a more positive attitude live longer. Her little talk helped me to recalibrate my thinking and adjust my outlook. She said I should embrace the time I would have with my spouse. Maybe my making that small change in viewpoint contributed to my spouse’s living almost two years longer than first anticipated. Only God knows if it did.

By the way, we can learn a lot if we read our Bible.

7.2 Learning to Laugh

Part of caring for a person with a chronic illness is learning to laugh.

7.3 Bible Verse

Proverbs 17:22 (KJV), “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.”

7.4 What the Verse Means

Our attitude is crucial when dealing with a chronic illness. The cheerfulness of our mind does good like a medicine for the body. Our opinion contributes to the restoration or preservation of bodily health and vigor.

7.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Lord Jesus, help me to enjoy the funny things that happen in life.
  • Heavenly Father help me to take life one day at a time.
  • God, help me, and my family and friends to not dwell on the seriousness of the chronic illness, but rather help us to live life to the fullest as we know You hold the future.

7.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. How is your attitude? Do you need an attitude adjustment? If so, God can help. Ask Him.
  2. Are you remaining affirming and confident? Remember, your outlook and attitude are catching. I’m not talking about some false it’s going to be all better attitude but a realistic today is going to be a good day attitude — and I’m going to do my best to make it a good day approach instead of a gloom and doom outlook.
  3. What can you do to bring joy and laughter today? Is there a favorite movie or comedy series you could watch together?

7.7 Takeaway

As you care for your loved one, a positive attitude helps.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

Any Delay Could Be Life Threatening

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Any Delay Could Be Life Threatening

6.1 My Story

“I need your decision on starting radiation treatment. What have decided?” asked the surgical oncologist.

“Not today. I can’t make a decision today,” said my wife with angst in her voice.

It was apparent she was overwhelmed with everything.

“Any delay could be life-threatening at the worst and life-shortening at best. You need to decide on when you want to start treatments,” pressed the oncologist.

My wife rolled her tired eyes. She was less than a month from the initial Melanoma cancer surgery and the removal of both the cancerous area and thirty-four lymph nodes. She had a swollen left arm, wrist, and hand. Lymphedema therapy had just started that week.

Miss Benita glanced at me for help.

“Can you go over the treatment options for us one more time? We’ll then go home and have some time to meditate and pray on what she’ll do next. We understand the urgency for beginning treatment,” I said.

My wife exhaled slowly, smiled, and nodded.

This time it was the young surgical oncologist who rolled her eyes. She nodded and dutifully repeated the options. She concluded with a “Let me know soon what you are or are not going to do. While selecting no treatment is an option, not having the radiation greatly increases the chances of recurrence. If it recurs,” she added with a strong emphasis, “the Melanoma will be terminal. There will be no treatment or cure. You will die.”

“Thank you. We’ll let you know in a few days,” I said as I saw Miss Benita flinch. On the inside, I was mad at how the doctor had restated the obvious — “If it recurs, it will be terminal. There will be no treatment or cure. You will die.”

On the hour drive home, my wife slept. She was tired and weary. Over the next few days together, we prayed, read Scripture, and then she said, “Call the doctor and find out who I need to contact to schedule the radiation.”

I called the surgical oncologist getting the contact information. Benita called and set up an appointment. 

I was amazed at God’s timing. The radiation doctor had a patient cancel an appointment. If we could come now, they were able to get her in that very afternoon. If we had rushed and said yes to treatment four days earlier, radiation treatments would not have started for nearly two weeks. Praying and seeking God’s guidance allowed treatment to begin almost immediately.

I firmly believe seeking God in her decisions is one reason why she lived over two-years longer than the initial projections.

It’s another example of my wife’s Godly wisdom and God’s faithfulness.

6.2 Hearing God’s Voice

Part of caring for a person with a chronic or terminal illness is listening until we hear God’s voice.

When we face a chronic disease too often, we rush in and try to accomplish everything in our power. We manage this. We plan that. We listen to this aunt or that special trusted friend. We may hear conflicting recommendations from our healing team, that is the doctors, ministers, social workers, counselors, and other caregivers.

While wise counsel is right, we also need to seek God and listen to his voice. We do this through prayer, Bible reading, and listening to sermons. 

We need to encourage our loved one to do the same.

Sometimes we are in such a rush to get to a solution or get things under control that we miss hearing from “The Great Physician.” We need to remember the words of Psalm 46:10 (KJV), “Be still, and know that I am God:”

Sometimes we need to sit and be still before we can hear God.

6.3 Bible Verse

Psalm 143:8 (KJV) “Cause me to hear thy lovingkindness in the morning; for in thee do I trust: cause me to know the way wherein I should walk; for I lift up my soul unto thee.”

6.4 What the Verse Means

As we face trials and hardships, we can find ourselves overwhelmed. When we become inundated by fear, grief, depression, and self-pity, it becomes hard to hear God.

Psalm 143:8 reminds us to spend time with God to begin our day with God. As Christians, we can trust God. We can ask him to guide us. We need to stop, that is too slow down and take time for God. We need to read the Bible and meditate on His Word. We need to listen, that is to hear sermons, hymns, and listen to God’s still small voice answering our prayers.

6.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father draw me to You in the morning where I can hear Your righteousness.
  • Lord Jesus, I place my trust in You. Help me to always put all my faith in You.
  • I ask Your Holy Spirit to speak to my spirit and to guide me in the way I should walk.
  • I pray You would lift my soul unto You.
  • I pray for myself, my spouse, our children, and grandchildren to be drawn to You, to experience You and choose to attend worship services where we can hear Your word preached.

6.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Are you including God in your decision-making process? James 1:5 (KJV) reminds us, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.”
  2. Are you listening for Gods still small voice? 
  3. Are you slowing down and waiting on God?

6.7 Takeaway

We need to spend time with God. We do this by reading the Bible, listening to Hymns and spiritual songs, listening to sermons, and by prayer and meditation. Spending time with God helps us make Godly decisions as well as helps us to wait upon the Lord and His timing.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler, please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

How to Have Real Deliverance

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How to Have Real Deliverance

5.1 My Story

Miss Benita left arm had started swelling up. The wrist and hand also were puffed up. Both were getting noticeably larger day by day. 

My wife called the surgical oncologist for instructions on managing the swelling. This surgeon referred my wife to the managing oncologist.

One day shortly after the phone calls my wife greeted me with new information. She said, “I have lymphedema.”

“They removed thirty-four of your lymph nodes last June when you had your Melanoma surgery. The lymph node removal and lymphoma seem like they might be related. Am I right?” I queried.

“Don’t look so smug. You don’t know everything,” Miss Benita replied playfully.

“It looks and sounds serious,” I said staring at her left arm and hand.

“It is.”

She went on to explain to me that lymphedema is a condition of localized fluid retention and tissue swelling caused by a compromised lymphatic system. In her case, the cause was complications from her cancer surgery.

“Can they treat it? What are they going to do?”

“I have an appointment with a lymphedema therapist later this week.”

She saw the lymphedema therapist. She was treated in the therapist’s office daily for two weeks of massage by hand of her arm, wrist, and hand. The massage therapy was followed with lymphedema therapy machine being delivered to our home. 

For the next twenty-eight months she would attach herself to the device for an hour a day to reduce the swelling in the arm.

And no, she didn’t have to do the therapy the remainder of her life. Five months before her death the brain tumor she developed had an unexpected positive side effect. A combination of massive amounts of steroids taken to reduce swelling in the brain also reduced swelling in the arm. Miss Benita was overjoyed not having to do the lymphedema therapy. 

The lymphedema was just the first of six addition afflictions my sweet wife experienced following her initial surgery.

Somehow, she maintained a Godly, optimistic attitude through it all. I can testify the Lord Jesus delivered her out of it all.

As her caregiver, I helped her stay on schedule, encouraged her, and picked up some of her former household responsibilities where she could go to the treatments without feeling guilty.

5.2 Deliverance for the Believer is in Jesus Christ

Part caring for a person with a chronic illness understands God’s deliverance for the Believer in Jesus Christ. The Bible does not flatter us with the false hope that goodness will secure us from trouble. Instead, the Bible warns us over and over to expect tribulation while we are in this body.

Our afflictions come from all directions and at any time. The challenges are many, but with Jesus Christ, we can face each day.

There is no promise the challenges, problems, illness, or disease will go away in this lifetime. However, the Lord will guide us through or lift us out of them.

5.3 Bible Verse

Psalm 34:19, “Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.”

5.4 What the Verse Means

We either have faced, are confronting, or will experience afflictions and trials. Suffering is an unchangeable fact.

There is good news. God’s mercies are more numerous than the afflictions and trials. God’s wisdom more wondrous than the sufferings and trials. God’s power is more miraculous than the hardships and trials. God will give us the grace we need to face them, and God will deliver us.

5.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father, I know the afflictions of the righteous are many.
  • Lord Jesus, I find some comfort in knowing hardships and trials are the norms.
  • I confess I don’t like the difficulties and trials but trust in You.
  • God our Father, I give You thanks for the promise of deliverance.

5.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. What new challenges is your loved one facing?
  2. How can you help them as they navigate the new challenges? 
  3. Have you asked God for the grace you need for the problems? Give God the glory for meeting your needs when he provides the needed grace. Acknowledge his presence and activity in your loved one and your lives. 

5.7 Takeaway

We face many challenges. With Jesus, we can face each day.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.

How to Rest in God

Posted in Blog, Caregiver, Caregiving, Jim Kepler, Jimmie A. Kepler, Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Jimmie KeplerLeave a comment

How to Rest in God

4.1 My Story

You may be like my late wife when she was battling Stage Four Melanoma cancer. She found herself very tired. She needed rest. 

My daily caregiving of my wife also left me weary. Like my wife, I needed rest.

The managing of my wife’s schedule required a skillset that even an air traffic controller would envy. First, she had the never ending visits to her primary medical team. The army of medical doctors included the primary care physician, surgical oncologist, managing oncologist, dermatologist, gastro endocrinologist, thyroid doctor, cardiologist (the heart must be healthy enough for the treatments) and radiologist. These physicians did the routine checks, prescribed the medications and treatments, performed biopsies and surgery as well as ordered the tests.

A group of medical technicians did the grunt work of tests and treatment procedures. In this category was blood work, PET scans, CAT scans, MRIs, days and weeks of radiation treatments and the lymphedema therapy.

At home, my wife did months of daily chemotherapy prescription medications, spent hours waiting for UPS or FedEx to deliver the refrigerated prescriptions from the exotic, super expensive pharmacy, did 24/7/365 lymphedema therapy at home with the machine that sounded like Darth Vader with a sleeve that looked like the nose of Snuffleupagus on Sesame Street.

Added to these challenges was managing her work schedule to maintain health insurance. These alone were enough to have her constantly exhausted. Unfortunately, more daily challenges were adding to her fatigue.

My wife’s eating schedule controlled her life. She had to take the prescription medications and then wait two hours to eat or eat and wait several hours before she could take the medications. The routine dictated the time of day when she woke and went to bed.

You get the picture and can relate. Like my wife, you get tired. Yes, the patient gets tired. The caregiver also gets worn down. The caregiver makes sure the loved one stays on schedule and task. 

As the caregiver, you need to rest. You need God.

4.2 Resting in the Lord

Part of caring for a person with a chronic illness understands the need for resting in the Lord.

Caregiving for a loved one with a chronic illness can leave you tired and weary. I am talking about becoming bone tired. I am talking about the type of fatigue that vacations or even a sabbatical cannot cure.

4.3 Bible Verse

Exodus 33:14 (KJV), “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

4.4 What the Verse Means

The Lord is telling Moses that God will personally go with him. The Lord will give him rest. He is informing Moses that everything will ultimately be fine for him.

For the caregiver, this doesn’t mean that your loved one will be healed in this life. Final healing may not happen until heaven.

The application for the Believer in Christ is the Lord also personally goes with us, gives us rest, and promises to sustain us during our caregiving journey.

4.5 Pray Using Scripture

  • Heavenly Father thank you for Your presence going with us.
  • Lord Jesus, thank you for the rest You give us.
  • God, we ask to experience Your rest again this day.
  • Let us use Sundays as the day of rest and worship.

4.6 Responding to God’s Hope

  1. Remember a recent time you felt God’s presence. What were you doing? Recall how you felt his presence.
  2. Ask God to go with you and be with you today as you work and go about your caregiving responsibilities.
  3. Are you getting enough rest? Are you reading your Bible regularly? Are you getting enough sleep? Are you taking time to be still?

4.7 Takeaway

God personally goes with us both sustaining and provide the rest we need.

If you are not a Christian, accepting Jesus Christ as your Savior is a prerequisite to obtaining God’s peace.
Click HERE to find out how to become a Christian. You can trust Jesus Christ and become a Christian now.

Photo Source: Pixabay

This blog is from the forthcoming book, “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D.

To receive a notification when “Caregiving: Biblical Insights from a Caregiver’s Journey by Jimmie Aaron Kepler, Ed.D. is available and to get occasional updates on the writing of Jimmie Aaron Kepler please complete the “Email Sign-up” found in the far left column of the blog.